Hey Alito! Pie hole!

The Auto Repair Shop that Dripped Blood

Lurking with evil at the corner of West 150th and Brookpark is The Geek Shop. The letters of its sign out front drip with blood. No one knows why the letters drip with blood. Anyone foolish enough to ask has never been seen alive again.

For Whom Doth the Geek Shop Drip with Blood?
It Drippeth for Thee! It Drippeth for Thee!

And Now, A Brief Word from Our Sponsors...

Synchronicity or Not? (A Public Service from O'Ghoulihy)

I am often asked by friends, colleagues or, more disturbingly, complete strangers, whether a particular experience of theirs constitutes synchronicity. Here are some recent examples:

Question: "I saw an electronic billboard as I was driving on the highway and it said the time was 3:33 and the temperature was 33 degrees.  Is this synchronicity?"

Answer:  No.  It's just a lot of threes in a row.  Keep your eyes on the road.

Question: "At a restaurant, I ordered a reuben and, suddenly, the guy from The Partridge Family whose name was Reuben popped into my head.  Is this synchronicity?"

Answer: No. Reubenesque, maybe, but it is not synchronicity.

Question:  "I got new fillings at the dentist, and on the way home, I was listening to the live Supreme Court Nominee Sonja Sotomajor hearings on NPR thinking about what type of amalgam the dentist had used for my fillings and at the very instant the word "amalgam" was in my head, Supreme Court Nominee Sonja Sotomajor used the word "amalgam" to describe a particular aspect of her judicial philosophy.  Is this synchronicity?"

Answer: No, but the new amalgam-based radio transmitter your dentist implanted to monitor the mind of a liberal elite is working great.

[If you need clarification of a potentially synchronistic event in you life, send a self-addressed stamped envelope to: SYNCHRONICITY OR NOT?  2121 Random Ave. Cleveland OH or just type it in the comment section below.]

O'Ghoulihy Smells the Metaphor

Influenced by Non-Fictional Accounts

do not, under any circumstances, ask me to
explain how to synch up Close Encounters of 
the Third Kind to The Dark Side Of the Moon 
so that this song plays when the mother ship 
arrives.


All right, all right! I'll tell you. But don't ask 
again. You wait until the moment in the movie
when a military guy utters the phrase, "the 
dark side of the moon." And you begin side 
one of the album.


Heartbeats. helicopters. "breathe."


And if you get all confused as to why the music
doesn't quite synch up after "The Great Gig in 
the Sky" ends, it's because you have to wait 
until someone else in the movie utters the 
phrase "the dark side of the moon" to begin 
side two of the album.


Now, don't ask again or I'll send you here.

Inspired by Actual Events

Based on a True Story

The Anthem of Clevelandia

walked swam hunted danced sang

(Happy 50th, Mr. Stipe)

Let's put our heads together
and start a new country up
Our fathers' fathers' fathers tried
erased the parts they didn't like...

A Cuyahoga Joke:

Corruption and Reform walk into a bar.  Corruption says to 
the bartender, "Hey, a coupla drinks for me and my old
friend, here..."

Reform says, "Now, wait just a minute. I'm not your friend. 
You just happened to open the door for me. It's purely a 
coincidence that we arrived here at the same time. I don't 

know you and you don't know me."

So Corruption says, "You use that line everywhere we go, 
and there ain't a bartender in town who's fooled by it. We 
drove here together. "

"I know," says Reform. "But you keep opening doors and I 
keep drinking for free."

"It ain't exactly free, you know," says Corruption. "There's 
bribes, kickbacks, payoffs, shakedowns, hush money, not to mention campaign contributions..."

Reform sticks his fingers in his ears. "La! La! La! I'm not 
listening! La! La! La! I'm not business as usual! La! La! La!"

Based on a True Story

Inspired by Actual Events

Influenced by Non-Fictional Accounts

Edie Brickell Made My Kid Stutter

After downloading this song to my Ipod and playing it around the house a few dozen times, my kid started to stutter. It lasted a week or so, then passed. He was also in the midst of toilet training, which may have been a contributing factor as well.

I won't post any videos of him stuttering EVEN THOUGH THEY'RE HILARIOUS. It just seems to cross a line. However, with the aid of SCIENTIFIC RECONSTRUCTION EXPERTS, I've produced this video that depicts his temporary condition:

For the Love of God...Look at the Size of That Microphone!

Cinema L'inscrutable

As our protagonists enter the Lodge near the Kilbourne Plat, they brush up on their secret handshakes.

Take a Guess

Influenced by Non-Fictional Accounts

Based on a True Story

Inspired by Actual Events